Shuswap Ultra

Shuswap ulta

 My earliest memory is running on a trail with my dad (I had to be 3 or 4), and after running about 20 miles he took aside and gave me this piece of sage wisdom I will never forget.  He said;

 'There are three things you should never trust in this world, a politician's promise, all lawyers, and a Race Director's course description.'

This piece of sage wisdom has stuck with me for the last three and some decades, and on September 24th, 2022, it proved true once again. Here we go.............

My buddy Tom and I like to get together every year and do an ultra.  It's a tradition at this point that has become a curse.  Every ultra we've done together shuts down operations after we've done it (RIP Mighty Quail Trail, and Diez Vista 100).  So we decided this year to try and break the curse with the Shuswap ultra 60km.  If you like this race, I apologize.  The odds are not in it's favour (we are batting 100% in ending races).  

After race at the cabin

The Cabin

Beer holder in the cabin

Anyhow, we booked a cabin at the Salmon Arm RV and Camping resort (highly recommend as it is staggering distance from the start line if you are hung over).  I arrived Friday a few hours before Tom and got settled in, and upon his arrival we decided to head down to Sicamous to the Mara Lake golf resort to drop a vehicle for the next day (the race is point to point, and we didn’t want to walk 60k home).  As we drove to the resort, I admired the steep paved road that went several kilometers from the highway to the golf course (remember this road).  We stashed a vehicle in a field hoping it wouldn't get towed, and decided to grab some steaks and beers in Sicamous.  At dinner we discussed our plans for the next day, where we both realized neither had actually read the course description.  

 

 

I believe these are largely useless, because as my father once told me, 'course descriptions are like Aasop's Fables, not meant to be taken literally, more like a story you gather some truth from', but nonetheless we decided to go over the course.  After our intensive 30 second review we headed back to the cottage to rest up and continue drinking beer (this is an ultra pro move).

Saturday Morning.  Alarm goes off at 6:00am for a very humane 8:00am start.  Usually by 8:00am most ultras have you several hours in, suffering up a cliff or something.  We grabbed some greasy Mcdonalds and head to the start line.  Music plays, the race director asks people to move their vehicles that are parked blocking the course.  I am the only runner in just a t-shirt, except for the shirtless dude, it's a little chilly out. Today will be a good day.

LEG 1 (difficulty ranking 5/5)

distance 14km elevation 550m

We get our pre race briefing, I check the course description for Leg 1 (14km elevation gain 550m).  The race starts on a trail by the road before moving in to the forest.  We are in the middle of the snake of people, slow jogging (I just walk because.....why not?) and the human centipede slowly makes it's way into the forest.  Praise be that the trail begins climbing in a runnable fashion almost immediately.  This breaks apart the human centipede of runners, and Tom and I carve out a few feet of space.  

Apparently this leg has 175m of elevation loss.  I'm not entirely sure where the elevation loss was, but we slowly climb up the forested ridge.  The trail is entirely runnable.  The grade is good, trail is well worked in, not too soft, not too firm.  I've got a 3% rule, run everything under a 3% grade.  That will prove problematic on this leg, as I was hoping to get some nice hike breaks.  I'm pretty sure the first 10k were all up hill.  At the 10k mark we lose a bit of elevation, only to climb back up into the aid station.  I have almost 700m of gain on my tracker, but the 14km was actually pretty accurate!  The aid station was well stocked with expensive products, I reach for a couple GORP bars, and struggle with the packaging.  The joke is on us, as they are packaged in an indestructible alloy, and I have to rely on aid station volunteers to engineer an opening solution.  Gotta eat hard foods early, and pure sugar later (I would entirely fuel on GORP however!).

LEG 2 (difficulty rating 3/5)

distance 16km elevation 530m

Leg 2 starts with a nice run down a cross country trail before heading back into the single track,  apparently the 36 ribbons and arrows at the turn are not sufficient markings, as tales role in of numerous runners missing this one.  We totally 100% saw this turn before almost passing it.  Most of leg 2 is a blur.  I catch up with my buddy Clint and we chat about Tahoe 200 while clicking off the runnable km. I'm not seeing my hiking breaks yet.  Tom is raring to go, but I know I'll need those breaks at some point. This leg we are treated to great views and amazing single track.  We are with a large group of runners, and Tom and I nervously joke about this possibly being the race that could break our curse.  We apologize to the nearby runners just in case it doesn't.  At least they all got to run it once right?

I'm still waiting for the 320m of elevation loss on this leg, but the elevation doesn't feel bad at all. Maybe I've just become a better runner in the last 2 hours and no longer notice the gain. We lose Clint and his band of runners during the end of this leg and role into the next aid station after a slight decline.  I've got somewhere in the neighbourhood of 400m of gain for this leg.  Aside from the distance, it was very enjoyable, and possibly the best leg of the race.

LEG 3 (difficulty 1/5)

distance 10km elevation gain 340m

This is the 'just get through it' leg of the ultra.  Our plan is to take care of ourselves so we don't have to suffer later in the race.  I hate that I don't remember much of this leg.  It rolls up and down a lot, but no serious gain or loss.  We picked up New Zealand Ryan around this point (he'd hang out with us right to the finish).  I was just starting to get into this leg when it was over.  I got 8km and 300m of gain, but 350m of loss.  I had barely touched my water (mistake).  This was a very fun leg with lots of highly runnable stuff.

 

 

 

 

 

LEG 4 (difficulty 4/5)

distance 10km elevation gain 300m

This leg starts easy enough, and it’s only 10k so I barely restocked at the aid station.  We go down a road for a few 100m only to begin climbing up the road again (this is standard trail running procedure).  We are all shocked that another photographer is waiting to take our pictures on a walk uphill (this is also standard procedure at races and I have entire albums filled of me walking uphill).  Anyhow the friendly photographer tells us ‘enjoy the next hour on lovely single track!’.  I remember this.  We only have like 9km left right?  Maybe a solid hour, or a little more….right?

I begin doling out sage advice about how all race photographers are on uphills, when…….there is another photographer on a downhill minutes away!  This is the second time I’ve seen this in possibly 100 ultras.  Well played race directors, well played.

The single track does what it’s supposed to do.  We go up, then down, then up, then down.  Tom and I have both fallen once at this point, so we in an intense competition of who can find the most roots to kick. I do several a Brazilian soccer falls, but manage to stay upright.  Tom must be really enjoying himself as he is very quiet at this point.  He’s probably taking in the scenery.  We continue losing elevation, only to gain it again, in a rolling fashion.  I’m getting thirsty now and regretting not filling my second bottle for this leg.  We’ve got 9.8km on our GPS.  Aid station incoming right?  Oh look, a cut block and a road…aid station must be there right?

  We start passing runners moving about as quick as Mao’s Long march, and I’m starting to wonder where this thing ends.  The trail isn’t super quick, or super challenging, it’s like if purgatory was a leg finish.  The views are great at times but the gnawing in the back of my mind is telling me that maybe the course description might not be correct.  We finally see what looks like people and food, and know we’ve made it.  It only took us like an hour forty but we are in.  Tom and Ryan are still here, and now we just have the easiest leg left.  All down hill.  No more climbing.  Nothing evil.

LEG 5 (difficulty 1/5)

Distance 10km elevation 165m 

To start this leg, I grabbed another 3 ‘GORP’ bars (when I got home I googled these to learn they are $3 a pop, so now I’m starting to understand why races disappear the year after Tom and I do them) and filled both bottles with water.  Not taking any chances!  I started gnawing on one of the peanut flavoured hockey pucks (GORP  bars) as we began the descent.  This was the best part of the race.

The end of the road

For about 6.5km, the trail follows a mountain bike trail that descends to the highway.  Tom and I hiked the last part of this leg in reverse on the Friday, so I was fairly confident it wouldn’t be too bad.  As we got closer to the highway I realized the trail looked nothing like the part we hiked.  This wasn’t good.  We were following the flagging down the hill (I couldn’t imagine running this part if your quads were hurting!) when we got to a clearing.  What came next can only be described as a cruel joke, but as my father used to say, ‘race directors are a cruel lot, and there is no greater hive of scum and villainy then a course planning meeting’, so I wasn’t shocked.

We began to climb the near vertical quad trail back up the hill.  The race directors had moved some loose shale in to add some challenge.  Once we got to the top I recognized where we were, and knew the steep downhill was coming.  We had a 400m downhill run to the road.  It was steep and soft, and myself, Tom, and Ryan kept our distance in case anyone wanted to go for the win and take another fall.  Tom was the last out of the bush, bringing up the rear to make sure no one got lost on the way down.

Ryan and Tom dropping the hammer

Then we saw what we all knew was coming…..a 2km road hill.  Hive of scum and villainy be damned, we took off up the hill.  Tom decided now was the time to drop the hammer and make some time, and flew up the first 300m of the hill.  But it just kept going.  We’d get to the top, only to see another top.  Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, we saw the golden gates of the Mara Lake golf resort.  As we ran by the well dressed people in golf carts, we could all feel the end was nigh.  Ryan took off and left us in the dust, and Tom motored I’m when we hit the downhill to the finish line, the lake, and cold beer.  I brought in the rear.  I have no idea what our distance on that leg was, but our GPS average was       59.9km and 1750m of gain for the race. 

SYNOPSIS

Our professional review of the race (as discussed during the race) was somewhere in the ‘if this race doesn’t get cancelled, I would do it again’ neighbourhood.  The views were great, trails were fun, and course was well marked.  I enjoyed eating my body weight in GORP bars, and enjoyed finishing a half eaten one in my pack the next day on the way home.  But the bigger question I have to ask is, will this race break the curse?  I guess we will know in a year.

Big shout out to the crew that put this one on.  Thanks for letting me pay you to make me suffer.

Until next time, bury your trail poop, God is watching (Deuteronomy 23:13-14)

#FearTheBeard